Gina Conley, an Army veteran from Aberdeen, North Carolina, entered the hospital expecting a natural birth experience for her first child. However, her carefully laid plans quickly unraveled upon arrival.
“Everything that I did not want to happen had happened,” she recalled. “And I just remember that feeling of being just so utterly defeated.”
Her cervix wasn’t dilating at the expected pace, and her midwife recommended administering Pitocin to accelerate labor. Later, as she approached full dilation, the midwife suggested breaking her amniotic sac to help progress the birth. Though Conley reluctantly consented, she later reflected that she never felt genuinely comfortable with these decisions, and sensed her concerns weren’t being fully acknowledged.
Today, Conley works as a birth doula, helping other women navigate childbirth with more empowerment than she experienced. Her mission isn’t to discourage medical interventions, but to promote shared decision-making—a collaborative process where patients and providers openly discuss treatment options before making choices together. Research consistently shows that patients who actively participate in their medical decisions report greater satisfaction and often achieve better outcomes.
The Essential Question:
Even in a fast-paced medical environment, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask: “What happens if I do nothing right now?”
The Decision-Making Acronym: B.R.A.I.N.
Birth professionals frequently recommend using the acronym B.R.A.I.N. as a guide for patients to discuss critical questions with their healthcare providers:
- What are the benefits of this intervention?
- What are the risks involved?
- What are the alternative** treatment options?**
- What does my intuition tell me?
- What happens if I choose to do nothing right now?
“It’s essentially a structured approach for communicating with your healthcare provider during key decision points,” explained Margaret Buxton, a certified nurse midwife and vice president of clinical operations at Diana Health, a women’s healthcare network based in the South.
Buxton emphasized the value of listening to one’s intuition: “You experience emotions throughout your entire body, not just in your mind. Tuning into that inner guidance can help you make decisions that align with your comfort level and personal values.”
“We know that people who feel seen and heard during medical visits experience reduced anxiety and stress,” she noted. “Their capacity to absorb information, think clearly, and engage meaningfully with their provider significantly improves.”
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