I reject artificial intelligence in my email, and I certainly do not want it invading my refrigerator, thermostat, or reading glasses. I want nothing to do with digital appliances or smart home devices. I prefer to live entirely analog.
I am prepared to bring back CDs, physical books, video stores, and cameras with their lens caps. I miss newspapers that leave ink on my fingers. Most importantly, I want to return to games officiated solely by human beings, without the intrusion of instant replay.
It took me a while to adopt this final stance. For too long, I could not understand why we shouldn’t utilize modern technology to ensure every foul, catch, and borderline toe is called correctly. I viewed those who resisted as modern-day Luddites. But the Luddites were right.
Instant replay is a mess. It has been for years. While it usually corrects obvious errors, the cost is simply too high.
It ruins big moments. It turns enjoyable games into slow, miserable marathons. It encourages indecisive officiating, which only leads to more interminable reviews. Just look at what happened on Saturday in Michigan.
It does not merely turn a win into a loss; it takes a clear picture and makes it blurry. It manufactures uncertainty out of thin air. It makes us suspect that even with a dozen angles from a dozen cameras, those calling the shots still see only what they want to see.
By now, you have likely heard all about the closing seconds of Michigan’s ridiculous, widely disputed 13-12 victory over Western Michigan last week. The Wolverines attempted a Hail Mary pass on what appeared to be the final play. The ball fell incomplete with seemingly no time remaining on the clock, yet a curious review process resulted in a second being placed back on the clock.
That second long pass was caught for a touchdown, and one of the biggest college football upsets of the decade was narrowly avoided.
Since then, the Big Ten has offered unconvincing explanations for its officiating decisions, primarily revolving around the idea that the clock viewers see on their television screens is not the real clock. However, there have been no explanations regarding why the TV clock and the actual game clock were not synced properly in the first place.
Consequently, we are left with a slew of conspiracy theories, even though the NCAA claims there is nothing that can be done about the matter.
Much like twelve years ago, when one of the most notorious replay rulings in NFL history deprived the Dallas Cowboys’ Dez Bryant of a touchdown catch in a playoff game in Green Bay, the debate is not just about whether the review got the play right.
It is about whether the play even needed to be reviewed in the first place.
If we are heading down this path, the natural next step is asking if any play needs to be reviewed anymore. Can we not simply return to the old days when referees, linesmen, and umpires made mistakes and everybody moved on?
Here, I must concede that some implementations of replay have been unquestionably beneficial. The Hawk-Eye technology used in tennis is remarkable. The automated balls and strikes challenge system in Major League Baseball has also been a net positive. In both cases, the verdict arrives quickly, decisively, and without gray areas to navigate.
However, most calls are not like that. Most still require officials to exercise their judgment, whether that judgment is rendered in real-time or with the aid of slow-motion, frame-by-frame replays. More often than not, granting them the benefit of the latter simply is not worth it.
How many times can an NBA crew head to the scorer’s table to review the monitor during the final two minutes of a game? It is preposterous, and fans despise it. They hate being unable to cheer for a touchdown or a World Cup goal because they must wait for the replay official to weigh in first.
They also hate that the delay does not even guarantee the call will be correct.
So let us give analog another chance. There are plenty of other reasons to do so, and I would like to detail them all. But my VHS rental is overdue.
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